The 2009 UN Australia Day BBQ Plan

I've got Greeks coming. Sarth Afreecans; Clog Wogs - or the Dutch; and there's an old Alsatian - a human one, not the dog kind. There's a Chilean. There's also a Welshman and a bloke from Chadstone, where the shopping mall precinct thing is nowadays. With all of this in mind I've decided to sensitively make the following sensitive sausages, in order to offend as many guests as possible.

Greek Sausages: lamb and ouzo and oregano
Sarth Afreecan Sausages: I'll Google a Boerewors recipe...
Dutch Sausages: I reckon Veal with Gin and Juniper berries; and maybe I should cook them in milk?
Alsatian Sausages: Pork mixed with pork.
Welsh Sausage: Seaweed cannot be encased in sausage skins, at least not out-of-season.
Chilean Sausage: Chorizo. So pork with too much Spanish Paprika and too much salt. And not enough fond remembrance of Pinochet.
Chadstone Sausages: Add the following to a blender - an old AC/DC record, an EH Holden fender, and a pack of cigarettes that has recently enjoyed a spray-tan. Blend. Ensausage. BBQ.

And I also reckon a 'House Sausage' is in order. The only problem with all of this wonderful endeavour is that once the BBQ is at operational temperature and the beer is at operational temperature and the sausages are at operational temperature, well... suddenly the sausages all look THE SAME.

Thank goodness this is not a metaphor for Australian life.